Tag Archives: love

my eyes have seen.

Wow.  

I didn’t know that it would hit me this hard. As soon as Piero extended his 6-year-old arms toward me, my vision blurred. I could no longer see clearly, or think clearly for that matter, and I no longer wanted to leave. What really struck my heart was that he wouldn’t let go, he didn’t want to let go. It wasn’t me trying my hardest to hold on to him. It wasn’t me prolonging class an extra five minutes to get more time with them. It wasn’t me demanding hugs at the end of every class. It was him; rather, it was all of them. They didn’t want to let go, and I didn’t want to let them.

I’m not sure if I’ve ever felt such love in one hug.

Size certainly does not determine the quality or the quantity of love that’s possible to show in one embrace. At that moment, I felt completely vulnerable. Vulnerable because I thought I could no longer help these children. Vulnerable because there’s every possibility in the world that I will never see these children again; I don’t even know their last names. Vulnerability overtook me because in that instant, God told me why I had come to this country and how I can make myself better. Humility swept every other emotion away. 

God showed me that despite my doubts, hesitations and qualms, I had actually made a difference. I pray with all of my heart that these kids will remember me – not necessarily remember that I taught them how to greet someone in English and that conejo means rabbit, they’ll probably forget that in two months – but that they remember me because I poured the contents of my heart into caring for them and lovingly teaching them to the best of my ability.

I will certainly never forget their miniature hands raising their messily decorated tongue depressors (palitos), – a tool I used for when they wanted to be called on: no palito, no opportunity to speak – their miniature wingspan pressing open to give the biggest, most loving hug I’ve felt, their undeniable thirst for knowledge, their ability to learn English so quickly; even better, their desire to learn English that was unparalleled with any of my other classes.

They looked at me with their wide, almost-black puppy eyes as more than just an American girl, more than a volunteer, more than someone who will be out of their lives in four weeks, more than just their teacher. That look cannot be described, cannot be duplicated, cannot be forgotten.

This might just sum it up, though:

Ruth, one of my second-grade students, wrote this on my goodbye note:

 

Para: Mis Carli

Yo te quiero mucho mis Carli

Usted es como mi mama

Nunca voy a dejar de pensar de usted

Soy: Ruth

 

For Miss Carlita

I like you a lot, Miss Carlita

You are like my mom

I will never stop thinking about you

From Ruth

 

This, from a six-year-old.

I praise God for this opportunity, I praise Him that He worked so mightily in me to affect these kids’ lives. They certainly changed mine.

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Do everything in love. 

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Explorer.

Sensory overload is the best way to describe the first couple days in a foreign country. I wanted to see everything, buy everything and take pictures of EVERYTHING — the cute dog on the street, the dozens of stray cats and dogs lounging in the park, the fresh-flower stand, the weird fountain, the Kentucky Fried Chicken that was basically a gourmet restaurant in Peru, the countless Peruvians staring blatantly at the group of Gringos, and on and on.
I can’t say that I had set any certain expectations of Lima, though. I arrived by night, by rickety bus, by way of uphill, rocky, fall-off-the-cliff-if-you-veer-two-inches-to-the-right roadways. I couldn’t wait for any kind of bed by the time we arrived at the Dragonfly Hostel in Lima. So when I awoke the next morning, which really was the same day as when I had gone to sleep, I was ready to explore. A group of volunteers walked down to the ocean. The small waves rolling in were peppered with surfers of all ages. Peruvian beach bums couldn’t help but stare at us and try to use whatever English they knew to get our attention.
In a place like that, it’s hard not to be extremely touristy, and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with being that way. I didn’t talk much the first couple days, not because I was shy or intimidated, but I was simply in awe. I would remember that feeling of hesitation I had right before stepping on the plane in Arizona, and I’d think to myself…
There wasn’t a need for even slight hesitation. I’m where I’m supposed to be, and God’s path of righteousness is right here.
Do everything in love.
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He answers.

Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.

Matthew 7:7-8

God worked out my flight situation perfectly, that’s all there is to it. I had planned to be leaving a week earlier to explore, but when that fell through, I quickly had to change plans and experience the full day of travel, layovers included, alone. Don’t get me wrong, I can handle flying alone, I’m a big girl, but having prepared to have a travel buddy then suddenly not – that’s what pulled at my heart a little. With that aside, I said a couple prayers and knew each situation would be perfectly handled!

And it was.

On my flight, leaving the Phoenix-Mesa Gateway Airport – a rather small, homey airport which vends out cheaper airlines, airlines not many have heard of – at 12:50 in the morning on a Sunday was a fellow ASU Sun Devil.

An answer to prayer.

We had all of the same connecting flights, so we spent our seven-hour layover together, too. We took a cab from the Ft. Lauderdale Airport – you’d think international airports would be a little bigger – to a nice little diner serving all the folks just back from church. My new travel buddy, Emily, and I instantly hit it off, and I knew we would be friends even after we survived this trip.

An answer to prayer.

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After enjoying an Eggs Benedict breakfast bursting with flavor, our luggage in tow, we wandered to the nearby outdoor shopping center to find a – yes, you guessed it – Starbucks! This beautiful coffee shop also served as a shelter from the torrential downpour we didn’t quite avoid on our walk to Starbs. That was a sight to see, since I hardly have the opportunity to see the beautiful sight of rain.

An answer to prayer.Image

A lost cell phone (not mine), a delayed flight and a couple uncomfortable airport naps later, and I was aboard my Lima, Peru bound flight. Emily and I were initially sitting far away from each other, but a man basically offered to switch, so we were reunited – and in the emergency exit row with leg-room galore.

An answer to prayer.

The flight to Peru consisted of watching Project X and trying to hide the screen from the man sitting next to us, snoozing a little and just talking. At that point in the trip, it was just hard to sleep, knowing we would wake up in South America, and our adventure, our continued adventure rather, would begin as soon as we stepped off that plane.

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Do everything in love.

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Parallel.

There’s a sense of relaxation and peace here in this country that is difficult to find in Arizona. Or maybe in anyone’s home state in the U.S. There’s a deeper appreciation for life and for savoring each lasting moment. There’s a beautiful freedom encompassing this city that infects everyone with bright eyes and wide smiles.

This house has already become a home. My belongings neatly splayed across the room – shoes in a neat row at the foot of my bed, formal shirts hung up in the closet above drawers full of outfits I will surely stick out in. My phones, yes both of them, tucked into my bedside table with an analog clock resting a top – the click, click of the second-hand syncing itself with my heart beat as I lie gazing out the window at the eclectic neighboring houses.

Do everything in love.

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